


Scars and salvation

by Pamdracones



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Set after Season 2, canon divergent-sort of, not beta read we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29221338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pamdracones/pseuds/Pamdracones
Summary: Marcus is reflecting and punishing himself for the deeds of his past but Abby isn't having it.
Relationships: Abby Griffin & Marcus Kane, Abby Griffin/Marcus Kane
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Scars and salvation

**Author's Note:**

> This is a repost of one of my old fics that I posted on wattpad ca. 2016 (yeah don't @ me I am ashamed of myself too). Slightly edited from the old version because I wanted to correct some mistakes. Anyway, this was based on a HC we came up with one of my friends and I just ran with it. This is the first fic I'm posting for years so please be gentle. :) Hope you enjoy!

Evenings in the medical bay were always quiet. Silence enveloped the room, swallowing all the horrors of the day. Two lonely souls had found comfort in each other that evening. Marcus Kane and Abby Griffin were never supposed to grow close, but there they were, finding solace in each other’s embrace. They were the only people left in the room, sitting in the back as if they were hiding from the world. They sat in comfortable silence, letting the dusk and silence linger around them. Abby was straddling Marcus’ lap, leaning on his chest half asleep. Her cheek was resting on his shoulder and the continuous rise and fall of their chests was calming them both. The straps of her top had fallen off her shoulders and Marcus’ were gently drawing patterns on the exposed skin, lulling her deeper into slumber.

Marcus looked peaceful, eyes half closed, but his mind was racing restlessly. His eyes followed the trail his hands were travelling on her skin, utterly mesmerised by the woman in his arms. His calloused fingertips were tracing the lines and scars on her arms and backs. He was in awe of the strength and resilience that was hidden behind them. Marcus knew he didn’t deserve her. She was all love and light and he was not. There was no absolution for him but somehow, she had become his salvation. She had become his hope in the Ark and that hope had turned into his everything on the ground.

And she loved him. After everything he had done to her and her family, she loved him. He never got tired of hearing her whisper it to him when they were a mess of tangled limbs in the sheets, or when she was screaming it at his face in the middle of a heated argument. Against all odds, Abby Griffin loved him. It made him feel guilty. He knew he had loved her for a long time. Even before she had married Jake and had Clarke. And yet, he had tried to float her on the Ark while every fibre of his being had screamed at him to just protect her at all costs. He knew he had only been following orders, but he didn’t know if he could ever forgive himself. But somehow, she loved him, and he loved her. He loved her more than he ever thought he was capable of. He had been told so many times that he was a heartless man without a conscience so eventually that what he had become. He had taken all his pain and buried into the depths of his heart and never thought of it again. That had started to change when he had found her alive after the launch of the Exodus ship that almost killed everyone on the Ark. But even on the ground he had kept hurting her, putting the fate of the humanity above the woman he loved. He was a coward.

His fingers came across a rough scar on her lower back. A bang of guilt clenched his heart when he realised what he was touching. The lashing. The lashing that she had had to endure during the first days on the ground. The lashing that he had authorised under pressure from the guards. He wondered if the shame and self-hate would ever go away. He did not deserve this woman or her love. Sure, Abby Griffin was complex and extremely stubborn, but above all she was compassionate, loving, and empathetic to her core. She had always been too good for him.

His fingers kept stroking the sore memories of pain on her back while he pressed a gentle kiss on her shoulder. He felt the burn of tears in his eyes, threatening to spill over. He wanted- no, he needed her to know how sorry he was, but he knew he didn’t deserve her forgiveness. There was no absolution for him. “Marcus, stop”, she whispered against his shoulder. “It’s not your fault. I don’t blame you for what happened”. She lifted her head to press a kiss on his neck. “Stop beating the ghosts of our past. Stop kicking yourself. The Ark, the early days on the ground, there was no right or wrong. It was about survival, Marcus. It didn’t leave room for anything else. None of us could afford thinking about ethics and morals back then. We did what we had to do and we’ve all been punished for ours sins enough”, she continued. Her fingers came to gently lift his chin, encouraging him to look at her. “Look at me. Look at me, Marcus, and know that I have forgiven you. I have forgiven us. It’s the only way we are going to be able to move on. You and I, after everything, we deserve to be happy. I want to be happy with you”, she explained, letting the weight of her words linger in the space between them. “I love you, Marcus, and I have hope for our future”, she whispered before leaning in to kiss him properly.

If Marcus tried to reciprocate her proclamation, it was devoured by her heated mouth. Somehow, she had sneaked her way into his every thought, every dream and every fibre of his being. She had been the one to chase away all his nightmares and comforted and reassured him through his bursts of shame and grief. She had continued to love him even when the memories of their past had tried to shadow his mind. Somewhere along the way, Abby Griffin had become his salvation.


End file.
